Last week on Ruckus: the Game Changers pulled out a victory over the Hard Way to retain the QCW Unified World Tag Team championships • Razorblade made a triumphant return to the Arena only to be stomped out by the also returning International Workrate Consortium • Katsuji Ootsuka pinned "the Voice of Freedom" Drake Tremble to win a fatal four way match that also included the Immortals, who raised his hands and exchanged wry grins over his head post match while Ootsuka looked concerned
Bizarrely, we opened up in an empty Arena. Then after a few beats we heard footsteps, then several sets of footsteps, then the International Workrate Consortium took up five seats in the middle of the section closest to the ring. They exchanged looks between each other, before Serge Batroc said that they have the numbers. One of them, maybe even Rich somehow, will win the battle royale and beat Naz for the World championship. And once they held the top prize, the Consortium would live long at their rightful place atop QCW.
As they faded into the ether Jupiter Jones was sitting in the same section but a couple rows closer to the ring, more on the right side of the screen for those of us at home. The TV Champ said that when they faced off last month, Naz couldn't keep him down for 3 - and after he won the battle royale, he still wouldn’t be able to keep Jupiter down for 3, then he would not only add being a double champ to his Triple Crown, but shut up Naz once and for all.
As Jones faded, the Game Changers appeared in fifth row seats with an empty seat between Ashley Szabo and Bennett Carpenter as well as between Carpenter and the Tiki God, Al Buffett. Carpenter spoke, saying that a year's worth of work would pay off tonight when one of the Game Changers won the battle royale and was the one to end Naz's reign and put the World title next to an Unified World Tag Team championship. It didn’t matter to them so much which one of them got it done; once that happened, their old friend Naz would have no choice…but to look inward.
The Changers faded and were replaced by Mason "Razorblade" Savage, who sat in the middle of the front row and glared at the camera for a stretch. He broke the silence with his only sentence: "Tonight I get back my title."
That continued to play out over the next couple of minutes, with everyone from Erik Norville to Super Avi贸n to the Red, White and True that's in the battle royale vowing to win it and lift up the 13 Pounds of Gold after the main event…but the segment ended with Naz in the ring in dress clothes with the title over his shoulder. Naz shook his head slowly as if to say "They really ought to know better" before cackling and walking towards then past the camera, leaving an empty Arena in his wake as we heard him patting the title a couple of times.
Usual open, but then we got a freight of blue pyro for a change before being welcomed by the Quality Controllers, Steve and Starr. All they knew about tonight was the World title match that would close the show and the battle royale that would kick off this episode of Ruckus with limited commercial interruptions – and that would happen right now.
They threw things over to the returning Duck Eko, who went over the rules for the unfamiliar and reiterated the winner would earn a World Heavyweight Championship title shot tonight.
Since you can't tell the players without a scorecard, here's everybody involved:
"The Iron Dwarf" John Arneson, former Evergreen Wrestling League champion
Former TV Champ "These Hands" Roy Fade
All three members of the Unified World Tag Team champions, the Game Changers
Il Postino, somehow
All five International Workrate Consortium members
World TV Champ Jupiter Jones
His major rival, "Dashing" Pierce Moore
"Pyre and Ice" Erik Norville
Both of the Proper Villains
Both Drake Tremble and Ted Holland from the Red, White and True
The prohibitive favorite, former World and World TV Champ Mason "Razorblade" Savage
Super Avi贸n
The bell rang and fists started flying to the approval of the Quality Controllers. Obviously something taking almost four segments isn't going to get a full PBP, but I will note some of the highlights.
The first elimination was a stunner, as the ring swarmed Norville in the opening minute and he was bounced by not only the Red, White and True but the Consortium and Al Buffett's cannonball off Ashley Szabo's back sent Norville out to the joy of the crowd and the shock of the announce
Buffett and Arneson fought to draws a couple of times due to similar strength levels
The Consortium again targeted Razorblade l, but this time the former double champion got some help from the field with the Proper Villains leading that charge as you might expect
After some recent dust-ups and shady refereeing in recent singles bouts against members of the Game Changers, Super Avi贸n got a modicum of revenge by eliminating both Beckett Carpenter and Ashley Szabo; Al Buffett would get revenge on Avi贸n by buckle bombing a rana attempt and clotheslining him out
At one point Razorblade tossed Tremble over the top rope, only for Holland to crawl under the bottom rope in the ring to put his upper body on the floor and keep both of his hero's feet from touching the floor
Despite having 25% of the field, the battle royale was more miss than hit for the Consortium. Things looked fine for a bit - they took advantage of Arneson and Fade fighting by the ropes to toss them both at once - but Jason the Terrible caught his brother caught his big brother and unwilling Consortium member " the Wonderful" Rich Ward with a back elbow that was only inadvertent in Starr's eyes and sent Rich spilling to the floor. When Serge & Anton Stahl got in Jason’s face about his immaturity, Razorblade popped back onto the scene and tossed all three men before Pyotr Caviar could get his hands on him - then Caviar laid Razorblade out with a Russian sickle that made him somersault through the air before turning into a snow angel
Razorblade seemingly had Tremble on the back foot and looked like he was about to toss the Voice of Freedom only to get blindsided by another Russian sickle that this time sent Savage all the way to the floor to the shock of fans and the announce alike.
FINAL 4: Al Buffett, Pyotr Caviar, Jupiter Jones & Drake Tremble
A brief ad hoc tag match broke out, then when the bigger Caviar & Tremble got the upper hand, they both tossed the other over the top rope but the intended victim landed safely on the apron both times.
The remaining three men all teamed up to try and toss Caviar…at least that’s how it seemed, as Tremble snuck away from the attempt to push Pyotr over and tried to eliminate longtime rival Jones instead, only for Jones to scissor his legs around Drake’s arm on the way to the floor and pull the Voice of Freedom out and over with him, leaving two men.
This had Caviar written all over it, with Starr mentioning after he floored Al with a sickle that Pyotr had history with Naz and he would love to see the big Russian take Naz apart. But Al proved craftier than expected and managed to stave off elimination a couple of times before landing a battering ram style headbutt that may or may not have been low. It set up the last thing of the battle royale: Buffett somehow picking up and slamming Caviar over the top rope to win the whole thing to the delighted shock of the Quality Controllers.
| • "Tiki God" Al Buffett last eliminated Pyotr Caviar to win a 20 man battle royale and earned a World Heavyweight Championship shot tonight • | Muse’s “New Born” came on over the PA and both Carpenter & Szabo ran down to the ring to celebrate with Al and the fans, the Tiki God celebrating on the turnbuckles while some fans in the cheap seats whipped off their Hawaiian shirts and waved them overhead like a helicopter. I don’t rate battle royals but this was far more good than bad. As Al took to another set of turnbuckles to make A Familiar Gesture around his waist, we went into the first notable commercial break of the program.
We came back from commercials not to a Game Changers led celebration of Al Buffett, but in the middle of a promo battle between World TV Champ Jupiter Jones and his rivals in the Red, White & True (no Bash; just Ted Holland & the wizard behind it all, Drake Tremble). Steve quickly caught us up on Tremble coming out during the break to start running down Jones again, bringing Jupiter back out to respond.
The crowd was in the middle of booing a pacing Tremble, who dubiously agreed that they should be booing that thug in the ring holding stolen property. Tremble allowed a small grin, then pointed out that despite Jupiter beating him for the championship at Mischief Night, he hadn’t gotten his rematch for the title. Jones busted out a halfway decent A.I. impersonation in response wondering if we were here talkin’ ‘bout rematches before walking over towards where the Voice of Freedom was and sitting on the middle rope. Jones said if he wanted to get his ass kicked in the rematch the same way he got it kicked in New Orleans, the people here in the Arena would love to see it. Tremble started to puff up, with Holland clapping him on the shoulders and further pumping him up. Drake looked between Holland and Jones, then less on Jones, then not on Jones at all. He held up a finger to Holland and then turned to reface Jones, and then to the shock of everybody apologized for being selfish and wrapped up in his rematch when he was standing next to another man who had a very good claim to a rematch. He then apologized to Ted before saying if Jupiter was so kind to extend the opportunity to him that certainly a title opportunity could also go to his most loyal patriot. Jones rolled his eyes over Drake weaseling out of the match but said if wanted to send Ted to get his ass kicked instead it was all the same to him, so get a ref in here and let’s do this.
| • Jupiter Jones [c] ddq. "Swamp Trash" Ted Holland (w/”The Voice of Freedom” Drake Tremble) to retain the QCW World Television title 4️⃣ • | A rematch from two weeks ago, but the unsettling Holland continues to improve and reap the fruit from Tremble’s poison learning tree. Ted got in more offense here, debuted some new offense like a springboard lariat, and for most of the first half of the match would’ve been ahead on points were this amateur stuff. The veteran Jones showed why he’s earned the Triple Crown on the back end, and pretty soon had Holland in the deep water ready for the bubbles to stop coming to the surface. Holland raked Jones’ eyes and looked to Tremble, who tapped his nose twice on the floor. Jupiter came over to finish off the match and Ted kicked what would have been a 60-yard field goal with his testicles. ** ½
Everybody groaned as Jones went down in a heap, even you, and the double team was on in earnest. Tremble and Holland stomped out Jones, and even punctuated the attack with a combination STO and Lungblower that left the TV champ in a heap on the mat, the Red, White and True finally listening to the ref’s pleading to stop the offensive. Drake strolled over to Duck and got the microphone, saying that now that he’s had a little more time to think about it, he should take that rematch tonight! How’s right now work for you, Jupe the Dupe? Tremble had a manly laugh over his rhyme, but he quit laughing when a weakened Jones groaned out that even in his current state, Drake couldn’t beat him, so ring the bell.
| • Jupiter Jones [c] d. "The Voice of Freedom" Drake Tremble (w/”Swamp Trash” Ted Holland) to retain the QCW World Television title 5️⃣ • | And it turned out that he was correct! To be fair, this wasn’t even two minutes: once the bell rang, Tremble pulled Jones to his feet to floor him with a short-arm lariat, then ran the ropes and hit another (admittedly nice) lariat to drop Jones before playing to the unamused crowd. Tremble set Jones up for the Truth Bomb…and got small packaged for 3. *
Jones rolled out of the ring as a shocked Holland slid in, and the look on Teddy's face paled in comparison to the wide-eyed glass pane Drake's eyes were turning into. Ted recovered first and went towards the ropes by Jones to curse his name, but the QCW staple just smiled wryly and took back the TV title from the referee before he got his hand raised. Announce put over Jones' getting one over on Tremble as well as the fact that he was now halfway to being able to cash in the TV title for a possible rematch with Naz. Starr jokingly asked if Jupiter would have any interest in fighting Naz for a title as the rest of the College Park Family came out on the ramp to celebrate Jones' pulling off two wins on the evening.
Back from the break, where we went to a pretape featuring the QCW Women's World Champion Autumn Powers. She talked about being QCW's longest reigning champion before allowing that while she didn't know what Season's Beatings was going to gift her, but she knew that she would walk into and out of the PPV the longest reigning and Women's World champion, and if anyone wanted to dispute that with her, she was not a difficult woman to find.
The crowd popped for Enya Face, who brought on as her guest the World Heavyweight Champion: "the One Man Jihad" Nazir el-Fadal. Naz chuckled through the boos as Enya asked him what his thoughts were ahead of defending the title tonight. el-Fadal replied that the Little Al That Could was a cute story, sure, but Mirror's lackey? Against the REAL World's Champ? Well, despite the fact that they didn't deserve it, the rabble could rejoice - for in just a little while QCW's resident Chef Curry would be serving up some leftover squash. Naz started laughing at his own joke, then harder, and eventually despite Enya asking him a follow up question walked off the set having thoroughly cracked himself up if no one else.
As Diana Spare came to the ring and waited for the arrival of her partner/rival the QCW Women's World Champion Autumn Powers, We Took You Back To Last Week where OnlyFitness beat Powers and Spare thanks to Autumn whooping Scott Warren-Tisch's ass. Autumn came out next to a big pop, and she and Diana exchanged (mostly friendly?) words while they waited for OnlyFitness to show themselves. When Scott came out with his wife Karyn Tisch-Warren and Lolo Vuitton, We Also Took You Back To Two Weeks Ago, where OnlyFitness beat Science Fiction Double Feature – the next two women out in this triple threat tag. The tandem of Jane Doe and Cindy Monet filled out the triple threat match with revenge on their minds and hopes of fighting back into title contention…
| • Science Fiction Double Feature d. OnlyFitness and QCW Women’s World Champion Autumn Powers & “Night Sky” Diana Spare in a triple threat match • | …and suddenly the power rankings are shifting yet again.
The triple threat appropriately went for the better part of three segments, with the crowd most rabid to see OnlyFitness get their shapely asses kicked and not much caring whose boots were doing it (with them hoping for the boots to be Autumn's the most). Lots of nearfalls, plenty of saves and even dives from both Spare and Vuitton.
Down the stretch the tags came quicker even if they were with less force. It honestly looked like OnlyFitness was about to pull out the duke and got ready to finish the fight when they got their finisher fended off - Diana Spare broke up the Only Finished This and got pulled from the ring by Scott Warren-Tisch, which drew Autumn to help her partner and stomp out a pest. Cindy Monet won the match without winning the match by taking advantage of Scott's getting stomped out: while everyone was watching the bootleg handicap match on the outside, Karyn let go of her elevated Texas cloverleaf to see if she could help her hubby - dropping Cindy, who crawled to Jane Doe and tagged out before immediately playing dead. Lolo went to the floor to go after Autumn and Diana to save Scott…and Karyn walked into a heart punch that dropped her like third period French. The ref made the count, and none of the three women on the outside got inside quick enough to break it. *** ½
A couple of beats after the ref called it, they had their hands full trying to break up Lolo going after Autumn again, then when that started resuming Karyn got a running start and kneed Cindy in the back before resuming hostilities with Jane. Scott was barely moving and Cindy wasn't doing too much better, but everyone who had the capacity to throw hands was doing so (Starr got off an all time line about the only thing missing from the scene being a $200 flat screen). Eventually, Team Teal had to come out and break up the brawls with Cindy even getting back into the fray a few beats before the "Let them fight!" chants rang out in the Arena. Eventually, Sci Fi got their hands raised, but the announce noted that things might not be settled between all of these women just yet.
Back from the break, another vignette played full of Atlantic City’s ambiance in black and white with a raspy voiceover talking about it being a long time since they've known a fair fight, but if QCW's looking for someone who knows something about fights, then he guesses they're lucky…
K R I E G E R
coming soon
| • the Immortals pinned Katsuji Ootsuka in a triple threat #1 contender's elimination match • | Despite Naz’s threats earlier in the evening, this match was the one that came closest to being a squash and even Ray Charles knew why – the Immortals are still probably the most dominant tag team in recent QCW history if not ever, and despite his TV title reign Ootsuka is still something of a loner in QCW. So despite the fact that it was labeled as a triple threat fight this turned out to be closer to a handicap match. Ootsuka is no chump, especially after registering consecutive eliminations in the past two weeks, and about five minutes in went on an offensive high flying flurry first against the Revenant, then Einherjar, then managed to deploy the five Ds to duck a Revenant uraken that Einherjar didn’t. Ootsuka went on the offensive and eventually planted Einherjar into the mat with the basement rana driver and got up top before flying off with his signature Magical Sky…right off into the outstretched hand of the Revenant, who wasted no time in planting him with a Red Right Handed chokeslam. The Immortals exchanged similar glances to last week, then snapped off a beautiful Death’s Door before they both pinned him. **
After the replays we saw the referee checking on the disoriented Ootsuka while the Revenant and Einherjar exchanged some smack talk and smiles while “Killed By Death” once again provided the soundtrack for another Immortals triumph.
Before we got to the main event, the announce hyped up some big matches for next week's Ruckus:
馃専 Now halfway to a cash in opportunity, Jupiter Jones will once again try to defend the World TV title 馃専
馃専 It's a rematch from earlier tonight but this time in a three way dance OnlyFitness will face off against Science Fiction Double Feature and the team of QCW Women's World Champion Autumn Powers and "Night Sky" Diana Spare 馃専
馃専 And the Immortals, Einherjar and the Revenant will go one on one to determine who'll get the World Title shot at Season's Beatings…but who will the World Champion be? 馃専
On that rhetorical, the announce threw the proceedings TOTHEBACK ~! one last time tonight where Julius Duquesne III brought on the challenger: "Tiki God" Al Buffett.
Once the pop settled down, J3 asked Al about his mindset going into the title match. Al chuckled and said that he loved QCW because it was where he met the people most special to him, where the fans saw him and instead of laughing at him, rooted for him, and the place where he has had the honor and privilege of not only unifying but holding a share of the tag team championships. Meanwhile, a so called champion like Naz has no aloha; in fact, he desecrates titles, is a king sized asshole and does BS like try to make QCW's biggest event all about him just because he didn't like getting booed. Well, he wouldn't have to worry about that tonight, because tonight the people in the Arena would cheer. Tonight they will get their aloha, because Al's going to give them a reason to celebrate when he keeps picking up and dropping Naz until Naz drops the title. For all the sacrifices he made to get here, there was one more he had to do right now - prove under the biggest spotlight that nothing went with a Hawaiian shirt like 13 Pounds of Gold.
| | • the main event • | |
Muse’s “New Born” hit the PA to a big pop, and all the Game Changers came out onto the ramp with Al being last. Ashley pumped up the crowd on either side while Carpenter was clearly imparting some last second advice to their stablemate. Al took it in and exchanged fist bumps with them both before they went back to the back and Buffett made the walk to the ring. Buffett once again made the Very Familiar Gesture on the buckles right before “Arcarsenal” killed the mood and brought out The Two Time Champ.
This may have been a World title match, but Naz almost looked blase as he headed to the ring pretty much ignoring the crowd being 3:1 against him. He stood in center ring and replicated the pose he does outside of the Arena in the opening credit, golden pyro erupting from the buckles as Al kept his eyes on the prize.
Duck once again made an introduction for Naz’s opponent but not for Naz, and that wouldn’t be the last thing Duck got up to before the night ended…
| • "The One Man Jihad" Nazir el-Fadal [c] ddq. "Tiki God" Al Buffett to retain the QCW World Heavyweight Championship • | Once again, Naz looked like he might go after Duck, and that gave his opponent an opportunity to sneak up on him and start the match’s offense with Naz on the back foot. Buffett dominated the opening couple of minutes much to the champ’s shock, and it took a desperation rake of the eyes to set up a (admittedly nice) leg lariat before Naz was anything resembling his usual self.
Of course once he had the whip hand Naz, as usual, went out of his way to redefine arrogance and took special glee in riling up the Controllers and poking fun at Al by hitting a move on his smaller opponent then doing a few Hogan poses. Buffett hung tough and got control back when he slipped an el-Fadal cobra clutch and drove Naz facefirst into a top turnbuckle. Naz staggered away after eating it, only to eat a handspring standing tornado DDT that blew everybody’s mind and sort of hit a reset button on the fight.
Throughout the second segment and well into the third, Naz’s reign of terror started coming to an end. Buffett pressed him with high octane offense and feats of strength that caused Naz to have to survive almost double digits worth of nearfalls. After the last one where Naz had to get a foot on the rope and the referee caught it, the One Man Jihad tried to bail on the fight only to get stopped in his tracks by Al. Buffett flung Naz back into the ring, only for el-Fadal to kick the middle rope when Al tried to come in. Both Steve & Starr noted that at this point, Naz might have been fine escaping with a DQ W. Naz seemed to talk the referee out of disqualifying him, then took all the air out of the building with a buckle Outider’s Edge that left Al in a heap and Naz with an evil, evil smirk on his face. After hitting the Hall machine gun taunt, he cut Al’s throat and went for the WMDDT – but when Al fended it off, he sent Naz into the referee, who went flying into the turnbuckles before going down in a heap. Al went into the ropes and came off with another handspring only for Naz to hit an enzui leg lariat. Naz cut Al’s throat and then drilled him with a textbook WMDDT…but he looked up and around and saw no ref.
Then he saw his World title.
He saw it because DUCK EKO was in the ring and leapt up before crowning Naz across the face with it, and if the election was held in that moment, we would be talking about President Eko. Naz went down in a heap and Duck rolled from the ring as Al got his bearings about him, then snatched up Naz. Al not only lifted Naz but kept him held as he s l o w l y got up to the top turnbuckle then drove Naz into the mat with his signature Inner Strength.
A second referee ran from the back and slid into position to make the count – only for the original referee to stop the count. We couldn’t hear everything between Duck and the ref – the zebra seemed especially salty – but we did catch the tail end of the original ref’s statement: due to outside interference the winner of the match, still the QCW World Champ, Nazir el-Fadal.
The crowd booed this lustily as the referees headed to the back with the Game Changers following behind them and arguing Al’s case with both of the referees.
Back at ringside, Naz gathered up his title and wiped some of the blood from over his eyebrow before getting in Duck’s face and grabbing him by the lapels. The camera zoomed in as Naz threatened Duck, saying he had one chance to make this right or it was going to be a long, cold night in the ICU. Did Duck have something he wanted to tell the rabble at this juncture?
Duck gave a deep sigh and finally managed to look Naz in the eyes.
Then Duck shook his head no. Naz shook him, saying he better make a proper announcement right the hell now or he was waking up in the hospital, at which point Duck invited Naz to go [bleep] himself to probably the biggest pop of the past two years. As the crowd roared and the announce joined in the cheering, Naz looked shocked and even a little bit impressed.
That look was the next to last thing that Duck saw; the stiff MDK Elbow that literally knocked him out of his loafers was the last. The crowd gasped in shock over Naz hitting the announcer, but el-Fadal wasn’t done and started stomping on Duck after he went down. We heard noise at the announce, then we saw S. Mark Starr of all people go after Naz! The former QCW Champion landed a few rights to the roar of the crowd, but Naz kicked him in the balls and threw him head first into the steps to increasing waves of jeers. Naz gave Steve Vandeblanche a look that sent the play by play man into the front row, then he ran over to Duck’s fallen body, mounted it, and then started punching away. A wide-eyed el-Fadal was yelling and cursing, saying that if Duck was going to make him bleed, then he was going to bleed him dry. Naz opened Duck up and looked like he was about to run Duck into the post to make good on his threat when suddenly Team Teal came out to finally corral Naz.
But even this didn’t work out: Naz started laying out the security guards left and right, and that brought out Commissioner Holmes from the back moving with the speed of a younger man. Naz was busy shit talking a guard he dropped when he was suddenly in the air, then on the mat: Holmes snatching up his World Champ in a waistlock takeover and putting him on the mat to a big pop. Naz quickly dusted himself off and he and Holmes went nose to nose and exchanged things that most certainly were not prayers or banana bread recipes. A “Fuck him up, Scotty!” chant could be heard on air as Naz nodded, then rolled out of the ring and snatched up his belt before heading to the back. Commissioner Holmes joined the medical staff on the floor and he was checking to see if Duck was conscious when something small, green and white caught him in the head.
Holmes unraveled the little ball, which turned out to be a fiver. It was out of Naz’s hand, and a stonefaced Naz crouched over the Commish and the fallen Duck to say "Since you gave him the bullshit fine, you gave him the trip to the hospital. At least I paid it off with interest." Naz started to leave right before Holmes got to his feet and squared up, but groaning from Duck made him reluctantly decide not to fight and check up on his ring announcer, telling the meds to check Duck’s eyes.
And as Duck recovered, Holmes seethed and the Arena almost caved in from the force of the sold out crowd chanting “ASSHOLE!” at the top of their lungs, Nazir el-Fadal headed to the back and tapped his title twice before parting the curtains.
SOB was smiling when he did it, too.
