QCW Ruckus [s1e12 • New Year's Eve 2021]

We had our usual show open and then it was over to the usual suspects at the desk, who were more than happy to inform us of more history that QCW would be making in 2022 (now just hours away): a tournament instituting Women’s Tag titles, with the first round beginning on the first Ruckus after Cold As Hell.  Your participants? 

1. @smashleysmithofficial & Justine 

2. 
   

3. Angel Sisters (the creepy doll twin Crush alums) 

4. 
   

5. Forbidden Book Club representatives Bonnie Agrippa & Diana Spare, Equinox & the High Priestess

6.  

7. Hell On Wheels (more Crush alums, the hot tub tag machine - Jammerhead Shark & Block Solid)

8.  

9. Mean Season (Spring Green teaming with Winter Wonderland)

10.  

11. Science Fiction Double Feature (“the Electric Android” Cindy Monet teaming with Crush alum “Regular Human Being” Jane Doe based off their being simpatico at the Ascent battle royale a few weeks back)

12.  

13. The Sound of Thunder (Crush alum “Shieldmaiden” Val Curry & Bettie Rokker, another team blending QCW & Crush)

14.  

15. The Storybookers (Bella D’Ball & Wendy Neverland) 

The brackets will be put up on QCWWrestling.com in the days to come as well as put up on Ruckus, and the finals of the tournament will be held at the March PPV - Golden Rule.  But enough talk - NYE or not, this is still a Friday night, and here on Ruckus, we fight– 

| • Mirror Mirror d. “Tiki God” Al Buffett • | Considering their behavior in recent weeks, it was weird to see Mirror…for lack of a better term, a little weirded out by Al’s general conviviality.  They had control early on but lost it within a minute, and then Mirror & Al had pretty much a coin flip of a match that ended with Mirror countering the Lava Rock into a snap Code Red, legs over the shoulders for the pin with Al kicking out of it a fraction too late.  **  

Al hung his head a little after the match, then shook his head & nodded to accept the results.  Mirror got the mic (Scott Holmes was probably backstage with the censors on standby) and said this: "I'm at a loss. Someone as reedy and small as yourself who can wear shirts that ugly and go toe-to-toe with Toddzilla clearly has all the confidence in the world... would you like to have a drink with me?"  Al took the mic, smiled, and said “You had me at drink.”  They shook hands and walked up the ramp together.  Since this is professional wrestling this undoubtedly will never end in heartbreak.  Maybe they’ll be the first really tight friends who don’t let the BS get to them.   A recapper can hope… 

Anyhow, from there TOTHEBACK~! where Winter Wonderland was about to get interviewed by Enya Face, when the Storybookers (Wendy & the Red Queen) walked up to her.  Clearly remembering past history, Enya slowly backed out of the frame before you could hear her heels running down the hallway.  Winter squared up ready to fight, while the Queen admitted that the Storybookers had had a very long year.  Winter’s “No shit?” got bleeped a couple seconds late and a pop from the crowd.  The Queen did mention that they cut the dead weight of Mirror, and lo, how their fortunes have improved: they’ve added Bella d’Ball - they could become the inaugural Women’s Tag Champs - and on top of all that, they just came from Holmes’ office and are back on PPV at Cold As Hell. 

Versus the Forbidden Book Club. 

In matriarch fornicating W A R G A M E S, daddeh. 

Winter sarcastically asked why she was telling her about her plans to lose a handicap match.  The Queen swallowed a bit, nodded,  then shook her head and said the past is the past.  New Year, New and Improved Storybookers.  The FBC is trying to take over the women’s division, the men’s tag division with Gothic Horror, and of course they’ll go after the women’s tag belts themselves; does Winter think they’re magically going to overlook her if she’s in their way?  She doesn’t need to leave Mean Season if she’s happy there, doesn’t even need to like her former teammates – but for one night, the biggest night QCW history so far, in probably the most sadistic match in QCW’s 21st century, when the Queen thought of whom to go into battle, Winter wasn’t the top of the list; she was the list.  Would she join them inside the steel and beat these Craft ripoffs back into the bargain bin where they belonged?  The Red Queen extended her hand - Winter smirked - then turned on her (metaphorical) heels and walked off.  Wendy looked like she wanted to go after her but the Queen held her up and said “That’s not going to help anything.  Let her choose.” 

As the now two-man International Workrate Commission came out to the ring, Let Us Take You Back To Last Week where Serge Batroc started his weekly gauntlet against the IWC, trying to take them over by beating every one of them.  He went over Martin Williams, who then was shockingly (?) turned on by both Stahl & Windsor.  Serge didn’t help them, but he didn’t save Martin, either. 

| • Serge Batroc d. “King Carny” Richard Windsor (w/Anton “Teknik” Stahl) • | He did beat Richard clean in the middle in a nice match, though.  Windsor went after the leg early, and while Serge looked over his shoulder for Anton - they exchanged passive aggressive compliments last week before Teknik went out and advanced in the TV title tournament - Stahl, either because he’s in the main event tonight or because of his code, didn’t get involved at any point during the proceedings.  With increasing “Serge!” chants fueling him on, Batroc fought through the pain, threw Windsor around the late portion of the match with nice suplexes, then did a one-legged Arc de Triomphe to secure the pin with the injured leg figure fouring his good one during the pinfall.  Worth going out of your way to see, especially if you like no frills no bullshit pro graps. *** 

Stahl slid in the ring, and got in Windsor’s face – then shook his head, and clapped Windsor on the back.  He offered a hand to Serge, who laughed in his face and rolled out of the ring, before offering up a smile too wide to be friendly and yelling out “Two down, mon ami!”   Windsor was obviously apprehensive about heading to the back with Stahl, but it wasn’t him he would have to worry about – Williams came flying in out of the crowd and went after the Commission, but 2>1 and Martin eventually got a two-man wheelbarrow DDT into the ramp that stopped his onslaught.   

| • “The Island Flower” Luz Cruz & Summer Rose NC the Forbidden Book Club  • |  It never happened because as the FBC were coming out, Winter Wonderland ran out with a chair and started laying them all out.  Cruz & Rose were very much like “Not my circus, not my monkeys” and headed to the back.  The Club started ganging up on Wonderland, drawing the Storybookers with their own chairs, and people with steel chairs will always beat people without them regardless of gender.  Not only did the Forbidden Book Club end up laid out, but Bonnie “Equinox” Agrippa got her haircut into a mullet not even a Von Dutch enthusiast could love.  The Storybookers rejoiced, Winter nodded and smirked before heading to the back, and suddenly you get the feeling WARGAMES might just steal the show in the 6. 

| • Toddzilla d. Caballero Blanco • | As happened previously to another Caballero, QCW’s resident land monster ate him.  SQUASH After making the referee count to 5, Toddzilla piled on after the bell, but Caballero Verde (entirely possible they’re related) came out for the save and the luchadores knocked Toddzilla out of the ring even though they never knocked him off of his feet.  After that, Verde got on the mic and challenged Todd to a handicap match on next week’s Ruckus, which he accepted eagerly.  It’s a big go-home show with that underneath the TV Title tourney semis. 

After commercials? 

The Immortals.  

Teased for the past couple of weeks, this was the first time for QCW fans to see them in the flesh - the hot new signing of the tag team division, two bad-ass mofos who strike fear into the hearts of all their future victims – except, apparently, Gothic Horror, who came out in a bad mood and already dismissive of the newcomers, cutting them off before they could utter a syllable. Fear?  Pain?  How could two men who just got here put those silly notions into the heart of former and future QCW tag team champions, especially two men who were just playacting at what they already were?  The Revenant said that the Immortals had died and been reborn multiple times over, and if inferior copies of them were willing to be their first victims, then they were grateful for their sacrifice.  Gothic Horror sure AF didn’t like that, and headed down to the ring – only to be cut off by a bunch of NPCs, security, suits, et al.  Golly jee willikers, if only we had an upcoming PPV they could settle this beef at… 

| • “Party Animal d. “These Hands” Roy Fade, Mason “Razorblade” Savage, and Anton “Teknik” Stahl in a fatal four-way match  • |  These four men are going to be in semifinal matches in the TV title tournament next week: Stahl/Savage and Fade/Animal.  But with those matches next week, Scott Holmes made this the last QCW match of 2021.  Usual rules in effect, but still highly chaotic with all the moving parts involved, much to the constant roars of the crowd.  Fade and Stahl briefly teamed up, only to turn on each other.  (Phrasing!)  One Tower of Doom spot saw Savage come off the top with a Blockbuster to lay out Animal, who was on Fade’s shoulders, but Stahl broke up a possible winning pinfall.  Stahl got the Matter of Time on Savage, with Fade making an unlikely save.  Fade hit Animal with the Decision, only for Stahl to toss Fade and go for the win himself; Party kicked out at the death.  The end came off a different high wire act: Savage hit the Soul Crusher on Fade, only for Party to knee him in the back to send him out of the ring and score the pinfall on the obviously out of it Fade.  ** ½. 

"The Claw is Law" chants rang out as Animal celebrated in the crowd Fade seethed, and Savage started to get helped to the back by his friend (?) the QCW World Champion Mayhem – only for Savage to get fireballed in the face by somebody in the crowd on the aisleway, who would then jump the rail and throw Mayhem into the steps. 

Survey SEZ?! 

Nazir. 

El. 

Fadal. 

While EMTs checked up on Savage, Nazir threw Mayhem into the steps a couple of more times before throwing the steps in the ring, then Mayhem, then himself.  Already helpless, Mayhem was easy prey for a WMDDT into the top of the stairs; the show (and year) ended with Nazir bellowing “I WANT MY REMATCH, YOU CHARLATAN!  I WANT MY REMATCH!” on the top step yelling down at the unconscious Mayhem on the mat. 

…see you next year? 

Next: s1e13 Ruckus

QCW Ruckus [s1e11 • Christmas Eve 2021]

We open with a video package of Nazir El-Fadal sitting in a steel chair in front of a cozy fireplace scene that is obviously green screened. He is wearing a Santa hat and an ugly green and red christmas sweater that has the pattern of a championship belt above the waist. He is carrying an oversized leather-bound book gimmick that has “Twas Five Minutes Before Ruckus” on it in gold letters. He clears his throat and begins to read aloud:  

 

“Twas five minutes before Ruckus, and all through the fed, 

All the smarks were on Twitter, sans partners in bed; 

The wrestlers were stretching and lacing their boots, 

While arguing with agents about spots and worked shoots;  

When into the arena there rose such a clatter, 

The hard camera turned to see what was the matter;  

When what to the rabble’s dull eyes should appear,  

But the greatest of all, One Man Jihad, Nazir! (winks at camera) 

Now Mayhem! Now Savage! Now Party! Now Mirror!  

I can’t find a way to make this much clearer; 

You’ll all fall to me come 2022,  

Merry Christmas to Me! And Just Me! Now SHOO!!!” 

 

(roll opening, shot of crowd, Starr and Van de Blanche at ringside, on with the show)  

| • Mason “Razorblade” Savage d. “The One Man Jihad” Nazir el-Fadal in a first round TV title tournament match • | el-Fadal jumped Savage during his entrance, their rivalry really fueled up over the past few months by Savage being the first person to beat him clean and them sort of cancelling each other out at Yule Be Sorry culminating in Mayhem retaining the World Championship. 

 

They didn’t even get in the ring for the first three minutes, brawling around ringside with both men sending their opponent into the steps at different points.  Savage exposed a turnbuckle, then Nazir did as well; after that, both men escalated to grabbing chairs.  The referee settled them down from using the weapons and called for the bell, at which point a hockey fight broke out to the roar of the crowd.  Naz was throwing hard European uppercuts and Savage was matching him with forearms.   

 

Throughout the first segment it went back and forth, both men utilizing four counts to the referee’s frustration multiple times.  Nazir got the advantage by catching Savage coming in for a corner splash with a big leg lariat, and he spent the next few moments working over the head and neck of his rival.  Savage got the advantage by backdropping Nazir over the top ropes (el-Fadal also hitting the apron with his ribs on the way down) and then following it up with a high speed tope between the middle and bottom rope before tossing Naz in and drilling him with a lariat for 2.  Savage was working a cobra clutch back from commercials that Nazir eventually got out of, and a rope running sequence lead to Naz hitting an Air Raid Crush in the middle of the ring but being too worn down to follow up.  Savage survived the Hamrin Valley Driver, Nazir got his foot on the ropes after a slingshot Lungblower, and both men were down after they went for simultaneous crossbody blocks in the third segment (!).  The match ended when Nazir went for a Thoughts and Prayers, and Razor tried to mule kick himself loose.  Naz took a jump back to avoid it, but it loosened his grip on the cobra clutch, and Razor rolled him forward - right into an exposed turnbuckle - leaving him easy prey for the Soul Crusher.  Savage will now get Anton “Teknik” Stahl in the semis.  *** 

 

As Nazir recovered, "the Fury" Jim Jaspers came out, scoffed and offered up a sarcastic “See you down the pub, Nazzie!’ before leaving. 

| • Roy “These Hands” Fade d. Mirror Mirror in a First Round TV Title Tournament match • | Mirror Mirror’s hot streak over the last few weeks went cold as they came down to the ring, mike in hand, towards a waiting Fade. They laid into him about being “another MMA washout slumming it in a wrestling ring.” They brought up his 3-6 record and suggested that they thank him “for sparing him another humiliating defeat in the Octa…” Fade hit them with a right hook to the temple before they could finish the sentence. These Hands hits The Decision and rolls them up for the 1-2-3. On commentary, Starr just laughs. SQUASH.  

 

Post match, as These Hands was getting his arm raised in victory, the sound of an outgoing voicemail message from Dana White echoed thru Arena Quarantina, and the Quarantron showed an image similar to those that you see on the news when they play a 911 call, with a still picture of UFC Head Dana White in one corner of the screen, and a still of These Hands in the opposite corner. From there, the audience hears multiple voice messages from Fade to White asking about a spot on the next UFC card, each message sounding increasingly desperate. As Fade looks around confused, Mirror makes their way up the ramp. They make a gesture as if they are putting themselves in a headlock and tapping out on their shoulder.  

 

| • | • | • Don't forget to order your copy of the Best of QCW 2021 from QCWStore.com OR sign up for FITE with discount code #AndStill to get 10% off an annual subscription! • | • | • |  

Back from commercial, The Red Queen (formerly Dorothy Rubyslipper) and Wendy Neverland are standing in the ring, which is now adorned with white chiffon and lace. The Queen is wearing a red ball gown and the tiara that Mirror gave her at Yule Be Sorry. She is carrying a scepter. Wendy has on a green prom dress and elbow-length gloves. Both are still wearing elbow and knee pads and wrestling boots. It’s kinda hot. Anyway, the ramp now sports a red carpet that leads to the ring.  

 

Dorothy: Welcome to QCW’s WINTER FORMAL!!! As your new queen, It is my duty and privilege to invite you all to the Royal Coronation ceremony. With no further ado, let me introduce to you the new Storybookers princess: Bella Di Ball! 

 

The former Bella Bathory walks down the ring doing the royal wave. She is wearing a black prom dress with a red, sequined sash that says Storybook Princess, as well as the pads and boots. Wendy holds the ropes open for her. Her Majesty leaps over the ring ropes and heads to the announce table, where Van De Blanche hands her another tiara. She slides back into the ring. Bella kneels so Red can place the tiara on her head. Red then takes the scepter and “knights” Bella. Bella gets up and takes the mic. 

 

Bella: “My loyal subjects, let me say that I am honored to serve as your Storybook Princess. I’ve loved books since I was a child, and I look forward to giving you all moments to tell your children about, and your children’s children. But do not be fooled by the tiara and this very flattering dress. Inside this Beauty beats the heart of a…” 

 

The lights turn red and blink four times. Then the arena goes dark for a second. When the lights come back to normal, the three fairytale heroines are standing on a pentagram of red paint(?) and the quartet they call the Forbidden Book Club appear on the screen, faces clustered together like four people trying to get into frame on a Zoom call. 

 

Nancy Crowley: Just Call us “The Bitches Who Stole Christmas!” 

Diana Spare: With this circle we bind you all!  

Crowley: You are bound to lose every time you step into the ring!  

Equinox: Bound to fade from the public eye! 

Shelly La Vey: Now, like any old, dusty books we’re done with, its time to put you… 

In Unison: Back on the shelf!!! 

(The coven laughs evilly as the Quarantron goes off. Suddenly, Gothic Horror runs to the ring and furiously rips the decorations down. They rip the crowns from the heads of Red and Bella throw them to the ground and stomp on them, as the trio look on in shock. They leave the ring and shamble backstage. As Red comes to her senses, she grabs the mic.) 

Red Queen: OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!! 

 

Bella and Wendy go from distraught to furious. They run after Gothic Horror, and leap on Orlok & Vlad’s shoulders. They slap, scratch, and pull hair, but the vampire duo continue to shamble backstage, no selling the whole time. The camera goes back to the Queen, kneeling over her broken crown and wailing. Her mascara is smeared and she starts throwing the debris out of the ring. 

 

| • | • | • Commercials, including one for K2 Circuit Training • | • | • |  

 

Back from commercial, Gothic Horror continue their trudge backstage with Bella and Wendy on their backs, but this time, The Queen is in the mix. Seeing her former partners in trouble, Winter Wonderland joins the fray, and the four women stop the dead men in their tracks and start wearing the duo down. Sensing an opportunity for victory, Justine steps out from off camera and grabs Winter by the hair. She drags Winter down the red carpet down to the now-clean ring and the bell rings… 

 

| • Winter Wonderland d. Justine • | Justine controlled the opening couple of minutes, then pissed off Wonderland with a slap.  Already pissed and with renewed furor, Wonderland took Justine to the woodshed after that and stopped her cold with a chain of Nuclear Winter implant DDTs, pinning her with a piefaced lateral press once she completed the third.  * ½  Winter didn’t even let the referee raise her hand after the match, seething over Justine before rolling out of the ring and heading towards the back before commercials.   

 

During the break, Nazir el-Fadal found Jim Jaspers in catering and started fighting him - not a food fight, but an honest to Jebus brawl, one only broken up by about ten different officials and referees.  Jaspers got in a parting shot about Naz getting eliminated from the first round of the tournament and that maybe losing to Mayhem means Jihad Time is off.   

 

| • Serge Batroc d. “The Analyst” Martin Williams (w/International Workrate Commission) • | Batroc dominated the majority of the match, Williams not getting any assistance from the IWC a couple of times early on when he bailed out, them preferring not to influence the outcome (or possibly tired of Williams, period).  Williams eventually reverted to a couple of shortcuts to get ahead - thumb to the eye, boot scrapes - but once Batroc rolled out and got his eye and mind clear, he rolled back in refocused and closed out strong, finishing off the match with his Arc de Triomphe slingshot bridging German suplex.  **  

 

After the match, Stahl and Windsor slid into the ring.  Batroc cocked back his fist, then looked as shocked as the rest of us when they stomped out Williams.  Of note, Serge didn’t make the save…but he didn’t help either, eventually rolling out of the ring and fixing his gaze on Windsor before turning around and heading to the back, possibly because Windsor’s in the main event tonight and could win his way into a title shot.   

 

(Cut away to a black and white shot of two large men silhouetted in fog. The larger one is wearing a black leather vest. Cut to a close up on the giant’s pallid face from multiple angles. His voice is hollow, as you will hear in the voice over)  

TITLE CARD: REVENANT 

Revenant (VO): The end is nigh… 

(Cut to multiple close up shots of an equally pallid bearded man wearing Viking War Paint. In contrast to the cowboy, his voice is a low rumble.) 

TITLE CARD: EINHERJAR 

Einherjar (VO): …but the cycle will begin anew.    

(Montage of B&W footage of Revenant no-selling offense from some wrestlers and using power moves against others) 

Revenant (VO): All will fall… 

(Montage of B&W footage of Einherjar throwing hard forearms, superkicks, and knees) 

Einherjar (VO): …but the immortals will… 

(high-speed B&W montage of the duo hitting the spiked tombstone against various opponents interspersed with the duo emerging from the fog. Einherjar’s low rumble and Revenant’s whisper become a roar as they say one word.) 

In Unison: RISE!!! 

 

TITLE CARD: THE IMMORTALS ARE COMING 

TITLE CARD: NEXT WEEK 

|  Mayhem [C] d. “King Carny” Richard Windsor & “the Fury” Jim Jaspers in a non-title triple threat Three Wise Men match • | Windsor played the heavy here while both Jaspers and the champion got really positive reactions from the crowd. Windsor tried to pick and choose his moments to attack Mayhem & Jaspers, as Jaspers was particularly focused on getting after Mayhem in the early part of the match due to his narrow loss on his last Ruckus appearance.  Mayhem got the upper hand on Jaspers, only to get waylaid by Windsor, who then would eventually get laid out by Jaspers.  For the nearly 20 minutes the match went, that’s how things generally played out: Windsor’s hyena-like tendencies, Jaspers being (usually) a step above Windsor and Mayhem & Jaspers more or less going 50/50 when it was just one against the other. 

 

End of the match came when Windsor had Jaspers in an electric chair - Mayhem flew off the top rope with a tornado DDT on Jaspers that drew well-earned “Holy shit!”, “This is awesome!” and “Q Cee Dub!” chants from the attendees.  Jaspers bumped outside as a result, only to be jumped and thrown into the stairs (and then jumped again) by Nazir el-Fadal, who the crowd booed lustily.  Nazir tried to get at Mayhem next only to be cut off by a bunch of referees and officials, who led him to the back while the medical staff checked on a possibly concussed Jaspers.  Once things settled down in the ring, Mayhem got the upper hand on Windsor and put him away with a standing tornado DDT to set up the No More Words senton bomb.  *** 

 

Post match, we hit Mayhem’s music and the Quarantron flashed:  

 

#ANDSTILL 

 

Mayhem undoes a bow that an intern wrapped around the title belt and oversold a surprise look. He yelled to the crowd “AND IT’S JUST MY SIZE!” before taking a Santa Hat from someone in the crowd and putting it on his head as he holds the belt up in triumph. The fan liked it, the fan next to him didn't for some reason.  Mayhem's not a PS5, he can't please everybody. See you for QCW’s Fighting New Year’s Eve! 

Next: s1e12 Ruckus