Last Week On Ruckus: QCW is heading to the Cow Palace for their next PPV, Golden Rule on March 12th with every title to be contested • Más Histeria won a triple threat match to earn a shot at the World Tag Team championships tonight • Mayhem returned and successfully/barely defended the World Title against “These Hands” Roy Fade, then exchanged a nod with his friend (?) Razorblade…
Pyro, but no ballyhoo - QCW fights on Friday nights and the only thing better than a fight is a title fight:
| • College Park Family [c] d. Más Histeria to retain the QCW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS • | At Devil’s Night, Histeria beat former Family members (the newly monikered Hard Way) to claim the belts, which they dropped to Lucius & Jupiter at Yule Be Sorry - as seen in the opening highlight recap package, they won a triple threat match last week to get a rematch for the straps. So it shouldn’t shock that this not only went three segments and crept up upon the 30-minute time limit, but was easily the best tag match in Ruckus history and maybe the best tag match of the Quarantine Era, full stop. Opposed to usual Family matches, Jones was the one drawing the heat and getting his ass kicked for the majority of the match, Patton making multiple saves to save the titles. After a couple of teases that had the crowd ready to jump the ref, Jones sluiced free of the former champions and tagged Patton in, who’s freshness and quickness was no match for the opposition. End came when Patton hit his own Bolt From Olympus to set up the Bass Drop; Jones prevented interference on the pinfall, and the champs hold onto their belts another week. *** ½ Histeria grumbled and winced their way up the aisle while the champs proudly held up their belts on the buckles, bathing in the “Collipark! (clap clap)” chants from the QCW faithful. Good luck to the rest of the show trying to live up to this instant classic.
TOTHEBACK~! where Enya Face welcomed the QCW Women’s World Champion, Summer Rose. Summer confirmed to Enya she’d heard all of Karyn Tisch-Warren’s talk over the past few weeks, but what KTW wasn’t talking about was the fact that the last time they were in the ring together, she went down to the Come Up. So she can cut all the commercials she wants, do all the squats she wants, put up all the cute pictures on her site she wants – those are all things you can do when your time isn’t being taken up by being QCW’s longest reigning champion. Next week, she shuts up Miss Fitness once and for all.
| • Party Animal d. Mirror Mirror • | Last week, QCW World TV Champion and self-proclaimed Once And Future King of QCW Nazir el-Fadal told Mirror that they would never get a shot at his belt as long as they only faced lower-caliber foes. Mirror took this as a challenge and they are now trying their luck against Party Animal, who is climbing up the card despite a loss to Jim “The Fury” Jaspers.
Curiously, Mirror’s friend(?) “Tiki God” Al Buffett was nowhere to be seen. Tiki & Party were seen drinking together at Benjamin Valentino’s party last weekend. Could Mirror be jealous? Anyway, despite Tiki’s absence, Mirror was still accompanied by their other omnipresent sidekick, their microphone.
“Fans, Stans, and Haters… The Champion of Chatter, Nazir el-Fadal has decreed that he will continue to duck me like Mayhem ducks him until I face competition that he deems worthy. If I must go through Party Animal like he goes through a case of Hard Seltzer, then so be it.”
Mirror runs down Party for being reckless, clumsy, and a danger to everyone he faces in the ring. They offer the mic to Party, hopefully so he can admit that he has a problem and make the first of 12 steps, but Party grabs the mic, pauses for a moment, and…
“BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURP!”
The crowd, which is probably ⅔ as drunk as Party, pops huge for that belch. Mirror immediately strikes Party in the head and the timekeeper rings the bell. Mirror is used to maintaining a level of control in their matches, but they could not come up with a workable strategy against the elusive Party Animal. Party clumsily swung at Mirror, and Mirror was able to play defense until seizing an opportunity to hit the Look Inward. Unfortunately, Party’s flop sweat made holding him in a grapple next to impossible, and Party oozed out of their hold. Party blows a White Claw Mist into Mirror’s eyes and hits an awkward, but effective spear. Party eschews 12 steps for a count of 3. This was a styles clash, but the marks were into it and the gimmicks meshed well, so I’ll call it * ½.
As Party stumbles to the back, Mirror just sits in the corner, obviously confused over what the hell just happened.
From there, we cut from a close up of Mirror’s mask to a close up of Mayhem’s face with a black background behind him. The camera zooms all the way into his eye, and a rotating spiral pattern is projected in said eye. We then cut to a view of the iconic San Francisco skyline, and Mayhem jumping from roof to roof. He slips off of one roof, but catches himself on the rain gutter. As he looks down, the ground pulls further away from the viewer. We then cut to Mayhem jumping on boxes as part of his physical therapy from the car accident. As he jumps onto the box, he looks down, and once again, we see the floor pull away from the viewer. Finally, we cut to Mayhem in an empty Arena Quarantina on the top rope. He leaps off of the turnbuckle to deliver a splash to a sparring partner, but we then cut to a birds eye view of Mayhem as his silhouette spins and the ring is replaced with the same rotating spiral pattern we saw in his eye at the beginning of the vignette.
As his silhouette disappears into the center of the spiral, the following caption pushes out towards the viewer:
Party Animal was cracking open some celebratory Claw backstage when it was rudely slapped away from him by “the Fury” Jim Jaspers, who said he wanted a match against him next week. Animal agreed, but asked why they should wait. Jim smirked and said “Cheers.” then the next thing you know a hockey fight broke out. As you might expect, security and some suits had to flood the scene before any more windows got damaged at the Arena.
Let Us Take You Back To Last Week, where Rich Ward overcame the International Workrate Consortium and wanted a shot at the TV title; in addition, let’s take you back to Nazir el-Fadal getting a DQ win over Mason “Razorblade” Savage thanks to some unlikely help(?) from Mirror Mirror to get him halfway to the ten defenses he’ll need to log in order to cash in the TV title for a shot at the World Title.
Long thought to be the workhorse of the Ward Brothers, Rich put up a hellacious fight in this one, gaining several near falls, and looked to have things put away when he went for the family cutter. However, Naz had it scouted and reversed it out into a giant swing version of the cobra clutch (!) transitioned into the Thoughts and Prayers cobra clutch suplex. A particularly nasty MurderDiscusKill elbow had Rich almost out on his feet, but Naz kept him from hitting the mat only so he could hit him with a running WMDDT that sealed the deal. ** ½
| • “the One Man Jihad” Nazir el-Fadal [c] d. “The Wonderful” Rich Ward to retain the QCW WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP (6) • |
Post match, Naz rolled out of the ring and got a chair, freaking out Steve who reminded everyone how the IWC had taken out Jason Ward a few weeks back. But Naz “merely” opened the chair over Rich so the bar pressed down on his neck, and with the title in one hand and the mic in the other, cut a promo (as is his wont).
He apologized to Mirror Mirror, since he’d previously suggested they couldn’t beat anyone noteworthy when the reality is after tonight they couldn’t even beat a drunk who just fell off their barstool. What seemed to be a more heartfelt apology went out to an unlikely source - Mason “Razorblade” Savage. Naz noted Razorblade had a fair shot at the TV title that Mirror, ever so desperate for approval from the main eventers, ruined. Naz finally sees the truth: now Razorblade is getting screwed over by the same conspiracy that he is, all because Scott Holmes delusionally sees Mayhem as the chosen one. Mayhem couldn’t beat Naz clean for his property, so we all know he’s not the best. The rabble have chosen their champion, and we all know it’s clearly Razorblade. And it’s not like Mayhem can beat Razorblade, either – Mason didn’t lose that triple threat, and Mayhem beat him in a battle royale, not a match, to get the title shot. Face facts, rabble: if he’s not ducking Naz, he’s putting his “best friend” in the hospital and ducking him, too. That’s your champion – not the REAL World’s Champion. “Until next time, rabble, I ask of you one simple request:
Make me king.”
Cue Arcarsenal, pissed off fans, and a sneering Nazir – but also a clearly rattled Vandeblanche, who noted that Nazir’s outlook was warped but he clearly raised some interesting points, while Starr rolled his eyes and said it was typical Naz.
TOTHEBACK~! once again, where Enya welcomed Crusazdo del Oro. She started to ask him about his match tonight against Toddzilla, but quickly fled the scene when she saw Los Luchadores Locos approach. Gran Atomico said something to Crusazdo in Spanish, who replied that if he was a disappointment to the raza and lucha libre, what’d it make the guys who just lost their title shot clean in the middle of the ring? The crowd barely had time to “Oh, snap!” that one before Crusazdo found himself on the wrong end of a 3 on 1 beatdown, culminating in El Gato Negro lawn darting him into a vending machine. Referees came to get rid of the black hats while the medical staff checked on Oro, putting his match later on tonight in jeopardy.
| • The Forbidden Book Club (Bonnie “Equinox” Agrippa & "the Goddess of Love" Shelley LaVey) d. Hell On Wheels (Block Solid & Jammerhead Shark) in a semifinal Women’s World Tag Team Title tournament match • | Hell On Wheels is one of the many units gunning for the Club, who’s gunning for total domination in the women’s division at the very least. The former roller derbyists put up the fight you knew they would, but Agrippa & LaVey used their teamwork (as well as a cheapshot on the outside by Crowley unseen by the ref) to get the W. ** Agrippa/LaVey get the winners of next week’s Angel Twins v. Science Fiction Double Feature semifinal in the finals at Golden Rule. The now-standard red lights special took the Club out of the ring.
On This Date In QCW History back in 1978, “Sweet” Curtis Jones won the QCW title off of Billy “Mud Stomper” Porter in front of a sold-out Qualitorium. Yes, kids, that’s Jupiter’s dad.
TOTHEBACK~! where Enya Face tried to interview the Forbidden Book Club, who instead of opting to cut a promo, circled Enya and cackled for a while before leaving. Eagle-eyed viewers noted in the background that the Hard Way were briefly in the shot, saw the Club, and then remembered they left the dog open and hadn’t fed the stove.
| • Toddzilla d. Crusazdo del Oro • | Already banged up from getting jumped in the back earlier in the show, things got worse for Crusazdo when Toddzilla jumped him before the bell, throwing him into the steps once and the barricade twice. The ref asked Crusazdo if he wanted to fight and he agreed to have the match. He showed a lot of heart, but couldn’t get Toddzilla down for more than a short 2 at any point during the fight. End came when Toddzilla crotched Oro on the top rope and gave him an avalanche powerslam then followed it up with There Goes Tokyo; as Toddzilla celebrated in the ring, the Luchadores Locos were seen watching it on a monitor backstage and laughing at Crusazdo’s plight. * ½
Back to the announce, where Steve noted that Toddzilla’s frequent tag team partner “These Hands” Roy Fade had been fined $25,000 and suspended from this week’s show for his actions last week (a little picture-in-picture while Steve talked showed Fade punching out the referee after narrowly losing a World Title match to Mayhem last Ruckus) but that the former World TV champion would be back in action next week facing off against longtime rival Mirror Mirror. In addition to that there’s the Angel Twins/Science Fiction Double Feature Women’s Tag Team title semifinal that got discussed earlier as well as the Party Animal/Jim Jaspers rivalry continuing in a rematch, another defense of the TV title, and Summer Rose putting up the QCW Women’s World Title against the First Lady of Fitness Karyn Tisch-Warren. A lot of show next week, but this week’s show started with an instant classic tag team match and may end that way, too…
| • The Immortals d. QCW World Champion Mayhem & Mason “Razorblade” Savage • | Not quite an instant classic but a damn good TV match that ended in – well, I’m tempted to say an upset even though the Immortals are a long-standing tag team and Mayhem & Razorblade, while constantly in each other’s orbit, haven’t teamed that often, especially lately as they’ve branched out into singles successes. Early on there was some noticeable frostiness between Mayhem & Savage when they were tagging in by practically open-handed chopping each other’s chests, but it was that period that gave the Immortals the control almost off the bat and forced the white hats to come together as a more cohesive unit. Biggest pop in the match came from Razorblade & the Revenant having a strong style tradeoff mid-ring that ended when they both took each other out with simultaneous cross body blocks; ending seemed to come when Mayhem was looking for his signature senton bomb on Einhenjar but the Revenant threw Razorblade into Mayhem, forcing him into an unwanted 7-10 split on the top rope. Savage fell to the outside as the Immortals quickly took advantage and hit Mayhem with Death’s Door to get the victory. ***
After the match, the Immortals continued to stomp out Mayhem. A loud, mixed reaction ensued as Einhenjar and the Revenant did this, followed by a huge pop as Razorblade recovered and started to go after them for going after his partner. As these things tend to go, Razorblade was winning until he wasn’t, and the Immortals then started to stomp him out, too. Mayhem had rolled to the floor by where Savage had been, but he had an entirely different reaction to the events in the ring: he grabbed his World Championship and started staggering to the back, crowd booing loudly as he left Razorblade to get got. The Immortals checked to see if this was a feint, but Mayhem went behind the curtain – a few beats after he did, Razorblade got laid out by Death’s Door himself. A loud and mixed reaction for the Immortals, but Einherjar & the Revenant don’t seem to care too much about the crowd’s opinion; based on the familiar gestures around their waists, They Want the Belts!
We’ll see you next Friday night once again when QCW continues to bring the Ruckus!
Next: s1e20 Ruckus
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